sit down son

Oh my god my friends are cruel bitches. Hello! I'm alive, the heat did not, in fact, kill me as I was so certain it would. Thank you for all the birthday wishes! they make me warm and fuzzy.

So coming down here for my birthday was simultaneously a wonderful and horrible idea. Wonderful because I felt amazingly loved and popular when almost half the bar was there last night purely BECAUSE it was my birthday But as they then all decided to BUY ME SHOTS, I did not end up in a happy place by the end of the night.

I remember MOST things, like how no one gave me the opportunity to fail at walking and I was carried from my seat to a car and from said car to my bed, that I was stripped and put in my PJs by Steph and Bailey, that they also shoved water, bread and advil down my throat when all I wanted to do was sleep and that Long Island Iced Tea is the devil incarnate in a cup with ice and a straw.

Things I've been reminded of include projectile vomit and the fact that there was a shot of straight tequila in the midst of all that.

In a few hours, I'm going to be very embarrassed about parts of all that, but right now I'll settle for being vaguely queasy and wondering what the hell happened to my cigarettes.

I had fun though!