Savannah!

Right! So, yesterday we went to Savannah! 'We' being me, Steven, Jamie, and Justin. I had an absolute blast getting away from Augusta. It was kinda crazy though because Justin drove over here at like, 6:30 yesterday morning and we drove to Statesboro and met up with Jamie and then drove to Savannah- about 3 hours total. THEN we get a little bit lost down there...we were trying to go to the mall and it wasn't working quite right. So we stopped and asked for directions. Well, I stopped, Steven asked. We drive off that way and find a completely different mall. Which actually was pretty darn cool. SO we stayed there for a while, then went in search of the other mall, which we did find after some interesting driving adventures...And there was a carousel. So Jamie and I rode that and felt very...tall. But it was hysterical.

Then, no day trip to Savannah is complete without a trip to River Street. We hung out there for like, 4 hours, but my parking meeter oly held two hours of coins. We decided to risk it, and I got really lucky. No ticket. But we ate at Spanky's and Justin was searching for a huge rainbow flag (he couldn't find one, I blame it on being in the south). We basically went in most of the shops...Esp the candy oens. Jamie said Iw as a bad influence- he didn't eat anything healthy all day. *smirks* Steven got me chocolate-dipped strawberries (omg, soooo good) and a realy cool pair of earings. After our couple of hours there, we went back to the accidental mall. David was there! That was crazy. He works in Express and asked if I was going to Atlanta on friday for 'Happy Day!' as he put it. I'm not by the way. But it was pretty funny.

So, we drive back to Statesboro then, get there at like 8:30 or so and walk around Walmart to strtch our legs. Ran into Demarc, Brandon, and hell if I remember the other two's names...but we saw them briefly. Had to explain that Statesboro WAS actually a natural stopping point between home and Savannah when home is Augusta. Got a coke, gave Jamie a hug (actual count: 2) and drove to Augusta.

And wow, I was exhausted. I concked out at like, 12:40. NOT NORMAL. And my right foot hurts, still. haha. LOTS of driving. My car rocks though, so it's okay.

Bruise from yesterday is indeed an interesting shade of purple now by the way.

I just felt so good being away from home. Almost like I was back at school for a little while because I could SAY what I thought, and just be myself and jabber and see Jamie! (who believe me, I have MISSED.) Really, it was an awesome day.

Savannah!

Right! So, yesterday we went to Savannah! 'We' being me, Steven, Jamie, and Justin. I had an absolute blast getting away from Augusta. It was kinda crazy though because Justin drove over here at like, 6:30 yesterday morning and we drove to Statesboro and met up with Jamie and then drove to Savannah- about 3 hours total. THEN we get a little bit lost down there...we were trying to go to the mall and it wasn't working quite right. So we stopped and asked for directions. Well, I stopped, Steven asked. We drive off that way and find a completely different mall. Which actually was pretty darn cool. SO we stayed there for a while, then went in search of the other mall, which we did find after some interesting driving adventures...And there was a carousel. So Jamie and I rode that and felt very...tall. But it was hysterical.

Then, no day trip to Savannah is complete without a trip to River Street. We hung out there for like, 4 hours, but my parking meeter oly held two hours of coins. We decided to risk it, and I got really lucky. No ticket. But we ate at Spanky's and Justin was searching for a huge rainbow flag (he couldn't find one, I blame it on being in the south). We basically went in most of the shops...Esp the candy oens. Jamie said Iw as a bad influence- he didn't eat anything healthy all day. *smirks* Steven got me chocolate-dipped strawberries (omg, soooo good) and a realy cool pair of earings. After our couple of hours there, we went back to the accidental mall. David was there! That was crazy. He works in Express and asked if I was going to Atlanta on friday for 'Happy Day!' as he put it. I'm not by the way. But it was pretty funny.

So, we drive back to Statesboro then, get there at like 8:30 or so and walk around Walmart to strtch our legs. Ran into Demarc, Brandon, and hell if I remember the other two's names...but we saw them briefly. Had to explain that Statesboro WAS actually a natural stopping point between home and Savannah when home is Augusta. Got a coke, gave Jamie a hug (actual count: 2) and drove to Augusta.

And wow, I was exhausted. I concked out at like, 12:40. NOT NORMAL. And my right foot hurts, still. haha. LOTS of driving. My car rocks though, so it's okay.

Bruise from yesterday is indeed an interesting shade of purple now by the way.

I just felt so good being away from home. Almost like I was back at school for a little while because I could SAY what I thought, and just be myself and jabber and see Jamie! (who believe me, I have MISSED.) Really, it was an awesome day.

Annoyed

My mom is driving me crazy. I hate being in Augusta right now. Seriously, I got 17 hours of freedom yesterday and it was INCREDIBLE. I think I’ve gone into culture shock, basically. It’s like, I sorta resented the whole ‘mom telling me what to do’ before hand, but she’d built it up slowly since I’d come home so it wasn’t so bad. I got away and remembered exactly what life COULD be like, and I have never felt so miserable when I’m supposed to be ‘home’.

I seriously think that Statesboro is more my home now. If I can avoid it, I definitely won’t spend an entire three months here again, it’s cruel and unusual punishment.

I think the big thing is that my mom thinks I’m someone that I’m just…not. She has all these ideas...delusions of grandeur so to say. I’m the ‘perfect’ child and all that crap. I’m NOT. I just really suck and defending myself and what I think. Every moment living here is like a lie. I just hate it, I want to scream and shout and punch something.

I don’t make a good closet case anymore, not after being so open all school year.

What it really boils down to is that I need to tell my mom I’m bisexual, despite the fact that I know she won’t like it and likely won’t believe me and likely will be very pissed and have a big fight with me. I need to do it. And soon. Before I go absolutely mad, preferably. I keep checking myself, biting my tongue, biding my time…but WHY? I don’t really know. I just know she doesn’t believe it exists.

I think I’ll end up yelling at her that I hover around a four on the Kinsey scale and tell her to look it up, see what she thinks of me now.

But that’s really not in character for me. Yet neither is being straightforward and getting to any sort of point, so that’s probably how it will happen. I’ve had the opportunity to tell her, when it would flow right into the conversation (and oh how interesting that could be afterwards), but I always chicken out. I’m pathetic, really I am.

Oh, if this comes as any sort of shock to people on my friends list, sorry, but you’re rather slow. And I don’t plan on filtering this. I’m out, just not to mum and dad. Or Laura, but just because she can’t keep her mouth shut about like, anything.

Mom hates that I’m growing up. She wants me to be her little baby forever. And I’m NOT a baby; I’m 19 years old, for fuck’s sake. Stop being a pushy pain! SHEEZE. I can live my own life; I’d rather live my own life. I like living my own life, so let me!

Another thing, I miss Jamie. Yesterday was awesome, the whole dynamic thing was back. We start talking and it just gets crazy and it’s AWESOME. Seriously. I didn’t want to come home.

Justin pointed out to Steven (who told me afterwards) that Jamie and I are a lot a like. Steven went on to say that when we start jabbering (as he calls it) we go on a completely different wavelength and it gets almost impossible to follow. Hell, in retrospect even *I* don’t follow it all that well. But I miss that. I don’t have a friend like that here. I never really have before either. Now I do, I don’t like not having it for three damn months. Arg. Venting again.

Random Slightly Relevant Lyrics:
( I Wish I Could Go Back to College )

Not all of it fits, IE, I haven’t graduated and I don’t want to fuck any TA…but most of the rest? Yep. I’m ready. REALLY ready. Is it August yet?

Annoyed

My mom is driving me crazy. I hate being in Augusta right now. Seriously, I got 17 hours of freedom yesterday and it was INCREDIBLE. I think I’ve gone into culture shock, basically. It’s like, I sorta resented the whole ‘mom telling me what to do’ before hand, but she’d built it up slowly since I’d come home so it wasn’t so bad. I got away and remembered exactly what life COULD be like, and I have never felt so miserable when I’m supposed to be ‘home’.

I seriously think that Statesboro is more my home now. If I can avoid it, I definitely won’t spend an entire three months here again, it’s cruel and unusual punishment.

I think the big thing is that my mom thinks I’m someone that I’m just…not. She has all these ideas...delusions of grandeur so to say. I’m the ‘perfect’ child and all that crap. I’m NOT. I just really suck and defending myself and what I think. Every moment living here is like a lie. I just hate it, I want to scream and shout and punch something.

I don’t make a good closet case anymore, not after being so open all school year.

What it really boils down to is that I need to tell my mom I’m bisexual, despite the fact that I know she won’t like it and likely won’t believe me and likely will be very pissed and have a big fight with me. I need to do it. And soon. Before I go absolutely mad, preferably. I keep checking myself, biting my tongue, biding my time…but WHY? I don’t really know. I just know she doesn’t believe it exists.

I think I’ll end up yelling at her that I hover around a four on the Kinsey scale and tell her to look it up, see what she thinks of me now.

But that’s really not in character for me. Yet neither is being straightforward and getting to any sort of point, so that’s probably how it will happen. I’ve had the opportunity to tell her, when it would flow right into the conversation (and oh how interesting that could be afterwards), but I always chicken out. I’m pathetic, really I am.

Oh, if this comes as any sort of shock to people on my friends list, sorry, but you’re rather slow. And I don’t plan on filtering this. I’m out, just not to mum and dad. Or Laura, but just because she can’t keep her mouth shut about like, anything.

Mom hates that I’m growing up. She wants me to be her little baby forever. And I’m NOT a baby; I’m 19 years old, for fuck’s sake. Stop being a pushy pain! SHEEZE. I can live my own life; I’d rather live my own life. I like living my own life, so let me!

Another thing, I miss Jamie. Yesterday was awesome, the whole dynamic thing was back. We start talking and it just gets crazy and it’s AWESOME. Seriously. I didn’t want to come home.

Justin pointed out to Steven (who told me afterwards) that Jamie and I are a lot a like. Steven went on to say that when we start jabbering (as he calls it) we go on a completely different wavelength and it gets almost impossible to follow. Hell, in retrospect even *I* don’t follow it all that well. But I miss that. I don’t have a friend like that here. I never really have before either. Now I do, I don’t like not having it for three damn months. Arg. Venting again.

Random Slightly Relevant Lyrics:
( I Wish I Could Go Back to College )

Not all of it fits, IE, I haven’t graduated and I don’t want to fuck any TA…but most of the rest? Yep. I’m ready. REALLY ready. Is it August yet?